Decision time

13 Dec

So right after that bout of sunshine things have gone down the tube at twice the speed.

I need to make a decision and stop being a chicken sitting on the fence. And I need to do that now. Because I haven’t cried in a long, long time and today made me cry. And the tears just wont bloody stop.


14 Responses to “Decision time”

  1. The Wild Child December 14, 2011 at 5:11 am #

    Hope you get the clarity you need real soon and make a decision. It’ll get better, I promise. Just sleep when it gets unbearable (that’s what I do). There IS such a thing as Sophie’s Choice and maybe that’s why it’s so hard to make a decision……….? Maybe it’s not about you being a chicken on the fence..? Give yourself a break, girl.

    • hAAthi December 14, 2011 at 9:05 am #

      You’ve hit the nail on the head TWC. It is a Sophie’s-Choice-kinda-thing here and thats precisely whats turning me inside out. But I think I’ve made my decision now. Its just a question of taking the next step and being a little brave in the face of uncertainty thats heading my way.

      • The Wild Child December 14, 2011 at 9:35 am #

        So by definition, no one option is better than the other and you don’t need to agonize over it. Glad you’ve arrived at a decision. Sucks that it’s such a tough choice :(

        • hAAthi December 14, 2011 at 9:58 am #

          Well if I were to really think hard, the solution that stops me from feeling this miserable and shitty IS the best solution. But it comes at a cost. And thats the hard bit. Happiness/satisfaction over stability/money..
          The old me wouldnt even have thought nothing should come between me and my peace of mind. But these strange situations have made me diffident and strangely I dont trust my gut so much anymore. Thats what saddened me the most. Everything I think, I re-think. And I’m tired of going around in circles.

          Ok enough ranting :)
          Today is a new day and I’m feeling better. So hurrah to that!

  2. niyatiupadhya December 14, 2011 at 11:08 am #


    • hAAthi December 14, 2011 at 11:09 am #

      Watch out bob. Its coming, Its coming your way.

  3. dip December 14, 2011 at 4:22 pm #

    eh! there’s nothing that will keep you down for long. you’ve made the decision. go for it. in your heart, you know what’s right and what’s wrong. for you.
    sometimes, tears really help clear things up, they wash away the clutter. So, good. it’s gone!

    • hAAthi December 14, 2011 at 4:25 pm #

      the decision is done in my head, but theres time yet before it *goes* and i move on..sigh. wish me luck.

  4. Kavs December 15, 2011 at 1:06 pm #

    Good luck!! I recently made a work-related, work-status aletring decision – was quite nervous for the first few weeks. But now I feel light. Hope you find your sunshine soon!

  5. chandni December 16, 2011 at 5:35 pm #

    I send towards you the strength to move on and loads of hugs to cushion you….

    • hAAthi December 16, 2011 at 5:37 pm #

      Gee, thanks yo :)

  6. The Girl Next Door December 27, 2011 at 6:11 pm #


    Hope the decision has been taken, and that you are feeling better now!

    • hAAthi December 28, 2011 at 9:19 am #

      Well I’m feeling better, because the intensity of things have just sort of died down. I don’t know how long it will stay this way. But for now, things are alright :)


  1. The customary year-end panic attack « hAAthi - December 1, 2012

    […] and fence-sitting in the world couldn’t stop the real reality check that came in the form of one of the most horrid days of the last couple of years, which reduced me to tears. It was one of many days to come in the next […]

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