If there’s one thing that can completely unhinge me and the mood of the hour, it is the satisfaction of being in the flow. No, not that flow. This one.
Because do you know what happened when I was done procrastinating till I couldn’t anymore (which, by the way, was yesterday morning. Yes, I’m that much of a slacker.)? I realised that there’s only one thing that can happen when you push things so far that they can’t get much farther. I woke up, decided to suck it up and get to work.
The thing about some kinds of writing is that it doesn’t happen by force. This is a ridiculous bone to pick when your job depends on it, because every job comes with deadlines, and one cannot expect to have the luxury of sitting back, smelling the roses, watching the clouds float by and wait for inspiration to happen. But I just cannot tell a story with a deadline looming large. I mean, I can tell it, but it wont be a fun story. What I need to be able to write a good story, is some inspiration. That sweet spot where all the nebulous, meandering ideas crystallise in a single moment, fall into place and click on that bulb of inspiration.
Unfortunately for me, that sweet spot slipped in early last morning when I woke up in a frenzy. Because I had suddenly realised that there was no hiding now. No looking back, no slipping under and hiding for cover. Either I could get the job done. Or face the music. Better late than never, I thought to myself, and decided to get it done.
Thus ensued a frenetic rush at twice the speed to meet this deadline that was fast closing in on me. And right there in that mad dash, I had my a-ha moment. The one that had long evaded me. The moment of clarity, where what I wanted to say, how I wanted to say it, the words, the sequence, everything, just fell into place and flowed. The words seemed to just fly out at the speed of light, forming ever so eloquently even in my hectic fit of typing.
Not all procrastination is bad I guess. Because on the far, far side of what can be called the worst case of procrastination I have faced in a long time, I found my flow again.