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It’s raining blues

5 Sep

I think that maybe I am in the throes of what they call Notice Period Blues. And I’ve been in this place before. Though not quite in the same way. Last time I had a sense of angst, because I wasn’t ready to say goodbye. I didn’t want to go. This time around, I’m raring to go. I really want to just take that step ahead, do the things I have so far only lusted about. All the things I have put off, saving them up for the endless days of funemployment. I can’t wait, really. And all this endless in between is totally getting to me, often giving me a severe case of the notice period blues.

Okay, I’m not really blue, I’ll admit it. I have nothing to hate about my workplace. I have nothing to complain about. Besides, this week has gotten off to a surprisingly good start. I was actually elated on a Monday evening. And both Monday and Tuesday have gone off painlessly. Work got done, I actually had a few good ideas to share. Productive even. But all of that does not take away from the fact that I am on my notice period, the very nature of which brings a ten kilogram weight on anybody’s head. Dead weight. Pointless, weight that isn’t really doing much more than weighing down on you.

It’s getting to me so bad, that I even cracked a horrible, horrible joke about it.

What do you call it when its that time of the month, for two, painfully long months? Yes, you guessed it right. Notice Period.

I feel like I am in a constant state of limbo. Stuck in a state of semi-listlessness. Not knowing where I really belong, of what is expected of me. But what’s really making it extra hard to reign it in and pretend like it is just another day, like any other, is this:

Today is day 10. And it hasn’t stopped.

Everything is insanely pretty outside. This morning, I placed myself on my balcony for a good while, warm cup of chai nestled in my palms, I thought to myself, how can I be leaving this to go serve another day of notice period? I couldn’t. I didn’t want to. The weather beckoned, in a way that can only be responded to with music, putting pen to paper and a lazy day ahead. But I shook myself out of it, telling myself to take heart.

In time, I thought, and the only spark of optimism that kicked me into getting a move on was the thought that come October, there will be no more waking up to routine. There will be no more playing to the rules. Because in October, if a rainy morning begs me to stay and watch, I can will happily give in.

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15 Responses to “It’s raining blues”

  1. Sanjana September 5, 2012 at 11:32 am #

    when i was on my notice period, it was the most chilled out I’ve ever been! I didn’t have to worry about upcoming projects cos I wouldn’t be doing any of them, I didn’t have to worry about business development… nothing. I used to go to work, and chill! Have coffee, talk to my colleagues, surf the net and read interesting blogs… whatever I wanted!

    You’re the first person I know to have dead weight during their NP!
    But fear not… just think of it as a countdown to freedom! just a few weeks more! :)

    • hAAthi September 5, 2012 at 11:35 am #

      Im not stressed or not chilled. Im actually very chilled out. Im not taking on too much new work, just focusing on finishing off what I have to do. But theres a general sense of tune off, from my side and my team too. And that is giving me a weird sense of wasting my time. Thats the dead weight.

      Im not half as occupied as I used to be. If I have to come here chill, and chit chat, I might as well be doing that elsewhere. I dont see the point of two month notice periods frankly. Everybody sort of gets into this frame of mind of making do without the person, the person in question also begins to get in to exit mode. Then WHy drag it all out for two months?! I want to get on with life!

      • Sanjana September 5, 2012 at 4:25 pm #

        true. Thankfully mine was for 1 month. But I’ve heard of 6 months notice period even, depending on the position.

        • hAAthi September 5, 2012 at 4:27 pm #

          Mine would have been 2. I extended it to 4 because of some reason I now cannot understand :P and so yes, this is all my own doing. I have stretched it on far too long.

  2. My Soulitude September 5, 2012 at 2:44 pm #

    Leaving your job is never an easy decision, especially when you don’t have another one in hand. I did the same 2 months ago, and opted to be a freelancer. It was very very tough, especially given the fact that I had no savings for the rainy day because i never thought I wud not work some day. But when job sucks your life, quitting becomes inevitable.
    I am sure you will love the initial free months, specially when you love doing so many things, apart from work. and yes, u right, two-month notice period actually seems too stretched. Once you have resigned, no matter how long you have worked in an organization, u feel a sense of detachment. In my case, most of the organizations waived off one month in lieu of the PLs and other leaves.
    Wish you all the best!

  3. R September 5, 2012 at 3:37 pm #

    Dude! That joke? Ayyo, whatte class act, I say :P

    • hAAthi September 5, 2012 at 3:39 pm #

      thank you thank you! finally someone who appreciates a sense of humor!

      • R September 5, 2012 at 3:49 pm #

        Haha. I love it and I will quote it when my time comes :D

        • hAAthi September 5, 2012 at 3:50 pm #

          hopefully you wont be reduced to such meagre attempts at humor and you will go out with a bang and not a dying whimper like i am..gaahh!

  4. darkcomedy September 5, 2012 at 6:01 pm #

    I hear you. My previous organization also had a 2-month notice period which they invariably shortened to a month if one requested. So thankfully, I had only 4 weeks of this, but still it’s a sense of not being there already.. “there” being out of that workplace and into all the other new things that you know await you. I also think it puts you in an overthink mode for your future plans, making you jittery. Or maybe, that was just me. In any case, it will be over soon :) Look at it this way, this month has FIVE full weekends!

    • hAAthi September 5, 2012 at 6:04 pm #

      Hahaha, to be honest that thought has crossed my mind and made me happy to no end. I even have a weekend getaway planned :P

  5. The Wild Child September 6, 2012 at 8:01 am #

    Once again, I can’t believe that a) you volunteered to extend the notice period, and b) that they let you do it. Because where I work, that’s like saying could you keep the paychecks coming for 4 months while I slack off and nobody assigns me more work because they doubt how motivated I am to do a good job of it? So it’s two weeks, and the higher up you are, the more likely they’ll make it a week….on their own, that is.

    Think of it this way – you no longer have to put your game face on. Because they don’t expect it of you anyway right now. Think of it as a place you go to hang out with your colleagues. And *don’t* feel so guilty, please!!!! I know you haven’t said it but I can’t imagine what, other than guilt, could have motivated you to extend your notice period or feel this weight right now.

    • hAAthi September 6, 2012 at 8:29 am #

      Hehe yes guilt and some misplaced sense of responsibility. Which is all a farce in retrospect because i now realise how difficult it is. I didnt then. And there were a few other factors that contributed to my decision, whih all seem stupid now. Oh well

  6. nmaha September 6, 2012 at 7:01 pm #

    Some one is seriously paying you to do what you want. I agree the setting may not be the one you want but make the most of it, I say.
    I also admire the fact that you quit to do what you really want to do. *thumbs up*

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