So I’m stuck in the middle, in many ways. Work is on an extended limbo-like phase. I’m pursuing an opportunity that requires me to hold off on everything else I had going on. I’m waiting, and yet said opportunity is taking longer than anticipated to materialise. I’m 100% sure that if I drop it and accept the other smaller assignments in the waiting, I will immediately hear from the bigger one I was originally waiting on and then feel like a fool. So I continue to wait, and its really getting annoying to be stuck in the middle with no real idea of which direction to move in.
My routine is still floundering around in a state of disarray. Life has resumed in earnest, but functioning without that set routine back to the way things were is not easy. I need routine, it rules me. I let August go as my month off from normal life because I had so much happening, and ever since the maid-spat early this month, I have hired new help. cheerful, sweet and hardworking girl who has also agreed to help me out in the kitchen. This is way more than I could ask for at this point because maybe I can finally free up some time and stop cribbing about never having enough of it. But on the downside, she is engaged till mid-day and comes to my home at 11. This new schedule is taking longer than I expected to get used to. I am used to having my house back in order before I go off to the gym in the morning, a routine that sets the rest of my day rolling. Now everything feels like its pushed back by two hours because the clean up only begins at noon. We’re both doing our bit to work around it, and deal with everything shifting by a couple of hours, which some times means the dishes lie undone till noon (which drives me slightly batty), and lunch happens later than usual (which just makes me ravenous) and then afternoon spills over into evening — basically a new routine. But when you’re a creature of habit like I am, the smallest change makes you feel like you’re stuck in the middle. I really ought to pick up and get going, but everyday I feel like I’m going against the grain and not really moving ahead.
The Hungry & Excited website is being revamped as we speak. It was meant to be a 15 day project, but its taken more than 2 months. This is partly my doing, I got so busy with IFBM that I didn’t follow up as closely as I should have. And then I’ve been a bit scatter-brained about picking up and closing the loop. It’s almost done, and I’m happy with the way its turned out. THe minute it’s up and we’re set to go, I want to introduce two new cakes on the menu and start doing some small-scale local advertising. I’m exciting to hit play again, but I can’t do it until my website is actually fully ready and running. It also means I have to hold off on posting new posts, sharing anything else on the blog and generally moving on with normal programming. The wait is killing me. This neither-here-nor-there situation is really like being stuck in the middle of nowhere.
I’ve hit a roadblock as far as cooking goes. I’m constantly itching to eat something different and don’t always have the energy to whip it up myself. I find reasons to cop out of cooking a lot, or willingly let VC take over, or just be really bad and order in — and this is not normal in these parts. I feel like I’m not able to slip back to normal life, and it’s really beginning to annoy the crap out of me!Unable to move forward or backwards. Just stuck. Here in the middle, is where I am off late. It hasn’t helped that my home has been full ever since I came back form Bangalore at the start of August. I have underestimated the wonder that is having my own personal space. I love having people over, so I never imagined that 1.5 months of it would have stuck in the middle, not able to hit the pedal and get going with my life the way I know it.So I’m mostly just going with the flow. Doing things as I feel like, not planning my days too much and not thinking about it. I’m reading two cookbooks at once — if that qualifies as reading. Aparna Jain’s The Sood Family Cookbook has me wanting to bookmark every single recipe. Rushina Gildiyal’s A Pinch of This, A Handful of That, while not fabulous in a literary sense, does have a fair number of recipes I am itching to try. I have discovered a new love for recipe books, I realise. This is very new for someone who never makes a dish the same way twice.
I’ve resumed my training in full-swing and physically feel a lot better. Exercise sets a happy glow over most other things, making the limbo seem normal too. It’s good to have sleep, hunger and daily functioning back in order again. Cooking is a close second, and I’m almost there.
The only other thing I’ve been doing with a fair bit of regularity is helping VC churn out foodeo after foodeo. He’s working on them at top speed and I am almost afraid I won’t be able to keep up. Here’s the next — a makeshift Aubergine Lasagne — a lazy Sunday lunch that was as much fun to put together as it was to shoot, and then sit down and eat. It was the last meal the sister and us had together before she left and some parts of this film will always remind me of the epic month we just spent together.
And in honour of being stuck in the middle, and just going with the flow, this has been my track for the most part of t0day.