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Confessions of an endorphin junkie, part 3

17 Sep

I’ve been attacked by starting trouble for the most part of this week. I know it’s just Wednesday, but dragging my feet to the gym is not something have dealt with too often. I don’t like it, it’s very unlike me and I don’t know how to shake it off.

This week I have felt super lazy to get going. This is why I am almost afraid to take a holiday from training. Even though my body really needed the rest in August, deep-down I worried I’d face the sloth-attack when it was time to return. Maybe its the weather, or limbo-like situation I’m in, but every morning, I am overcome with this intense need to just stay home, sit around and wait for things to happen. All the while, I know at the back of my head that once I begin I will come out feeling really good. But try telling that to my heart that’s longing to just lounge around and not jump around for a change. Perfect spirit-is-willing-but-the-flesh-is-weak kind of situation.

But here’s the thing, I still managed to drag myself to the gym. Everyday. Because the promise of feeling fabulous and energetic an hour later is too good an opportunity to pass up. I’m thoroughly addicted. I wasn’t kidding when I said I am an endorphin junkie. Twice over. It’s no wonder really, because endorphins work pretty much like drugs and narcotics do. Wonderful chemical reactions in your brain and other parts of the body, where endorphins make masti with neural receptors to inhibit all signs of pain, dullness, lethargy. Tricking you into feeling so goddamn good, you want some more. And more. Until you basically just can’t get enough. So much so that even when your body is saying no!, some part of your mind is going yes! yes! yes!

So, like the quintessential junkie who needs just the slightest impetus to give in, I took myself to the gym. Unwilling flesh and all.

up

Because the only way forward, is up.

All it really takes is a few rounds of lifting some big-girl weights, or a couple of spunky dance numbers, some good music and  eventually, pretty soon, I’m bopping around like a happy trooper. Like one hit of a newly passed joint, or that swig of vodka, neat. And all is well with the world again.

I don’t know when I got so addicted to it. But working out has quickly replaced most other addictions in my life. Friends constantly crib that I am no longer as willing to catch a drink, and invariably stop after a few — unlike before. I’ve nearly given up most other ways to get high, and I’m that wretched person in most circles that can be described as annoyingly high-on-life. Sometimes just thinking about what it feels like at the end of a workout is enough to get me going. Starting trouble diminishes by half right there. Mid way through an ass-busting circuit, the mention of hurdles that are going to make an appearance in the gym, makes me go yay! and makes the aunty next to me roll her eyes.

Endorphins make me feel alive. The energy I expend over the one hour at the gym, oddly enough, sets me up to keep going through the day. It’s funny how it even makes me eat and sleep better. And to go through the day feeling elated, satisfied and like all is well, is the biggest bonus. They say an endorphin high actually heightens the sense of satisfaction you feel from working out, and makes you come back for moaarrr. Which is what takes me back, dragging fee in tow.

So I’ve been battling this starting trouble this week, but all it takes is pushing through that hint of a beginning of that nagging thought that says to-go-or-not-to-go. Because once I’m over that hurdle, and I do go in to the gym, the feeling evaporates in no time at all.

Today, it was this new cracking salsa number. I’m no great dancer, but by the end of this song I couldn’t wipe the grin off my face.

The trick is to just push through, begin, and let that energy rush do the rest for you. That’s just the beauty of endorphins at work. And I’m hopelessly addicted.

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16 Responses to “Confessions of an endorphin junkie, part 3”

  1. Santulan September 17, 2014 at 9:31 pm #

    And here I was thinking that these were dark chocolate cookies in the thumbnail..

    • hAAthi September 17, 2014 at 9:33 pm #

      HAHAHAHA. Youre toooo funny. Dark chocolate cookies alright. 25 pounders, at that!

  2. Santulan September 17, 2014 at 9:40 pm #

    This post reminds me of a woman who came to the same gym as mine (for the brief amount of time that I did go to a gym). She would go on and on on the treadmill. I had spent minutes in wonder in one of my first days watching her do it so enjoyably while I huffed and puffed.. When I asked her about it, she said that once she starts running, she doesn’t feel like stopping.. that it gets her high..

    A woman after your own heart, it seems.

    • hAAthi September 17, 2014 at 9:45 pm #

      Yes. Same pinch.

  3. Sarvani September 17, 2014 at 10:59 pm #

    Oh I go through it too.. whenever I take a break from working out.. the days just go by before I join back and then I push myself one day and wonder why I stayed away!! but you’re right.. every once in a while I need the break too!

    • hAAthi September 18, 2014 at 7:17 am #

      Yeah i took a break after a year of rigorous training. I really needed it. But yeah after a point you begin to wonder why you waited so long to get back! I keep changing the classes around to break the monotony, when im not up for a break. Haha

  4. perspectivesandprejudices September 18, 2014 at 1:28 am #

    Ah this reminds me of the high I used to get after dance class. Class would be early morning on weekends and I would have to drag myself out of bed, but once I get there and start dancing, it would be amazing. :D

    And you’re right about the amazing feeling it gives you all day :)

    • hAAthi September 18, 2014 at 7:16 am #

      Its probably true for any kind of physical activity. I danced on weekend mornings too, as a child. I went to a bharatanatyam class :) what did you learn?

      • perspectivesandprejudices September 18, 2014 at 7:46 pm #

        Bharathanatyam too :) But I’ve been learning for a long time. Nearly 15 years! :) Only recently stopped classes because I had to move to the US.

        • hAAthi September 18, 2014 at 7:55 pm #

          Wow 15 yrs is loong! I learned for about 12 years. Quit it about 10 yrs ago. Id love to go back, though.

  5. Nishnu September 18, 2014 at 2:58 am #

    I am reading this as I count down the hours before I get to Zumba. There’s this moment in the class where the awkwardness of dancing and watching yourself in the mirror gives way to a pure high.

    • hAAthi September 18, 2014 at 7:14 am #

      Yes totally. I know that feeling! Beyond a point, it really doesnt matter if you can actually dance well or not, no?

      • Garima Singh November 27, 2014 at 3:40 pm #

        Yes i agree to your point…..really true…..

  6. Garima Singh November 27, 2014 at 3:43 pm #

    I wannna to say that if you have will to do a work then you will automatically find the ways to do it………….
    I have interest in Photography and i got my aim………………

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Internetting | hAAthi - October 31, 2014

    […] into the dark side completely. But the dark side, is the happier side. I’ve joked about being addicted, called myself a junkie and shamelessly admitted to being a little uncompromising about my […]

  2. Day 207: Gym rant | hAAthi Time - July 26, 2016

    […] it’s a serious disease and I’m a self confessed endorphin junkie. Three times over, in fact. I rarely miss a class, bunking without reason is unheard of, so you understand why […]

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