I wrote an abysmal 24 posts in all of 2015. I’ve never been as disinterested in looking at that little compilation video of how well you’ve done wordpress sends you at the end of the year, than I was this year.
On a whim, while taking a walk on the beach on the first day of this year, I decided I was going to write more. Like I’ve said before, the idea was to write, just write. No edits, no cleaning up, no frills and fanciness, no aim or agenda. With every week that ends, I find myself wondering how far I will go, and I realised yesterday that I’ve very easily and quickly reached the 80-day mark. Clearly all it takes to break an old habit (or dry spell) is to inculcate a new one.
A large part of my motivation to do this was to inculcate some discipline in keeping a handful of daily habits. While I’ve faltered on a some, I’m going steady and strong with haathtime. Quite unsurprisingly (because that’s the point of daily habits and rituals) it has become easier with every passing day. The words flow quicker and stronger, but more importantly, it’s become a lot easier to find something worth ruminating about, something worth noting for myself. And it’s become easier to sit down and turn those thoughts into a ramble, to get that post done every single day.
I’ll be honest, and you don’t even need me to say this, this is a completely selfish, indulgent activity. I’m doing this for myself alone. To track some fundamental things for myself, to watch change, growth, and to just stick to it. 9 out of 10 posts are of the tl,dr variety, full of self-absorbed navel gazing of the highest order. I write expecting nobody to 1) understand 2) relate 3) appreciate any of it. So for those of you who keep coming back to read and comment, but especially those who don’t leave comments, but take the trouble to write to me, message me, call me and share stories of how you have gone through similar cycles, felt the same things I feel or relate to my rambles in even the minutest way, I’m deeply grateful. The list is pretty small, but I don’t need to spell it out. You know who you are <3