In a little under 60 days we’ll have crossed the halfway mark of 2016. It shouldn’t come as a surprise since I’m literally numbering the days right here (also can’t believe I made it to 130 days, zomg). But it is getting a bit tiring to repeat the omg-this-year-is-zipping-by spiel, but really. I mean, really. This year has zipped by like no other. The busier months amplify that feeling, I suppose. And April was one such month, giving me no time to transition from the lean, easy months at the start of the year to the madness that April brought. It was like being strapped in a rollercoaster and having someone press go when I wasn’t looking.
It’s that odd feeling, quite like I imagine the shifting of time from being a solid dot suspended in mid air, on days trapped in a kind of ennui that ensures nothing moves, to suddenly liquefying in an instant and thrashing around, swiftly sploshing about like the contents of a bottle lying sideways in the backseat of a speeding vehicle.
April was hectic. It was good, though. Mainly it was about a lot of hard work, and I should I have known this when the month began with this insanely busy day that set the tone for things to come.
It has been an immensely satisfying month, as far as work goes. I broke into more than one new publication, pushed things a notch up by cracking an essay that meant a lot to me personally. Got a leading Indian newspaper to ask me to write a first person account and lend a piece my voice. I also bagged a new big and what could potentially be a steady monthly gig which turned out to be really fun. Fingers crossed I am able to keep the momentum going.
April had its fair share of specially memorable moments because of all the newness. There was this experience like never before, working with an editor who, based on my experience, seems like a figment of my imagination of all the best things one hopes for in an editor put together in one person.
There was the week where I had not one, not two, but three new pieces come out in quick succession.
There was the writing of the essay that was a bit of a personal victory for me. But even more bizarre was what happened once it was published and out there. Shortly after I wrote that post about the aftermath, this happened and blew my mind a little. Just a little. Enough for me to shut down the internet for the day and go nap for a very, very long time.
Nostalgia-tinged happiness ran right through April. I realised I’m closing in on 10 years of blogging this month. The day I realised it, I fished through the archives and looked at posts from that same day, going back five years and it made for a fun throwback. I also recollected our trip to Sri Lanka by reliving it through VC’s holiday video from our vacation exactly a year ago. There was a significant amount of cycling time achieved.
Yeah, it was a high action, high contentment month. Despite work being hectic and full, things balanced out a bit, because April was also a month of being surrounded by friends. N came to spend a weekend that was mostly spend talking and eating. Non stop and in that order. And it was awesome, awesome, awesome. I realised after she had left that she is probably the only friend from all the way back in school, who I am still in touch with. That we could meet, hang out, share so much and discover so many things in common again, despite the years and distance that stood between us for so long, was immensely gratifying. I have always said the people who are in my life for a reason, who matter and with whom I choose to nurture ongoing relationships can be counted on one hand, and this is certainly one of those friendships for me.
And then there was the birthday weekend shenanigans that ended with me turning a year older, and definitely happier and more content.
There is a lot to be said for friendships that allow for incessant chatter, as much as they do for a comfortable peace and quiet, perfectly exemplified by the fact that every night of the weekend ended with us fading away into quietness but still lingering around in a comfortable quietude. Only until the sleepiest of us three would unabashedly excuse herself and put herself to bed (yes, you know who you are!), while the other two chatted away into the night in hushed whispers.
It’s a kind of comfort I have so far only had with family. And that was one of the biggest reinforcements for me. April reaffirmed a lot of my thoughts about friendship and sisterhood. A very specific relation pattern that I often find myself in, became very apparent. I may have even understood why I choose the kind of friends I do and in many ways it also explains why I fall out with as many people as I do, with such an alarming frequency. Most of all, I may have finally, really understood the place of friendship in my life, and hence no longer feel too upset when some relationships end.
I got a good glimpse of what it really sets enduring friendships apart from the fleeting ones that come and go, or the ones that exist in the periphery and sometimes serve a very perfunctory, short-lived purpose. I really must complete the post I have started writing before the thoughts swim so deep into my brain where they get really comfortable and it gets hard to pull them back out again.
I woke up on Monday after the birthday chaos, ready to take on a new week, new month, only to collapse into a complete fatigue-induced lethargy that made everything slow down so bad. Try as I might, the retrograde and the fatigue caused by the heat and the lack of sleep from last week kept me from functioning as I would have liked to. And before I knew it the weekend had rolled on again. Zippity, zip, zip.
I want May to zip by too. There is a trip to Bangalore I am looking forward to, after which I should be back in Goa hopefully in time for the first rains. April, thank you for the highs, the memories, the love and the incredibly memorable birthday, but I’m so ready to say goodbye and move on from this godawful summer.