Cry freedom

Scratch Bombay. Say life, instead?

***

Came out of therapy today, thinking about just how much bloody work it takes (even after one has peeled off many ,any upper layers to get closer to the authentic self) to make any head way with the work of getting over all the unnecessary things I think about myself. On a daily basis — there’s a bedrock of seemingly small judgements, piled high with layer upon layer of daily self-loathing. Over that comes the beating-myself-up for petty transgressions, just for some crunch. And finally the fluffy top layer of shame. And it’s all deceptively delicious, pretty to look at and promises to pack a serious punch.

There comes a point after when the road to the authentic self gets so subtle and the shifts so nuanced, it’s like clutching at straws. This moving from the level of the personality to the inner core involves so much of moving away from what I think I know about myself, to what I discover of myself, when I have successfully let every little judgement, every bit of shame, every unnecessary standard fall away.

IT’S TOUGH.

One year ago: Digging to find the happy
Two years ago: The future is no place to place your better days

Pour your thoughts over mine

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.